Well it's been 2 months since liver surgery, and everything is pretty good. I have one heck of a scar and still have some pain related to it, but it's slowly getting better. I started another round of chemo two weeks ago. This time it's pills and an infusion every two weeks.
The pills finally made me lose my hair. I've had a couple of false starts on that one, but there was no doubt that it was going away last week. I let the kids dye my hair all different colors before we shaved it off. They had a lot of fun with that, and even with the cutting it short. When they realized that I was going to shave off the rest, they freaked out a bit. Abi still won't look at me if I'm not wearing a hat! I know she'll get used to it eventually, but right now it's pretty hard for her. She's always been the most sensitive.
I don't know if I've just run out of things to say, or what has happened... Maybe I've grown bored with writing about the status quo. My posts are getting farther and farther apart, and there's less content in each one. Maybe there will be more interesting things later, but so far all I have is the baldness, and sickness during the infusion.
Oh yeah, if I didn't mention it before, I went back to work after five weeks off from surgery. That was a blessing as I was going to lose my mind if I stayed home any longer! So things are back to normalish.
Monday, November 17, 2014
Saturday, October 18, 2014
The New Deal (It has nothing to do with FDR...)
Ok, alter some confusion and more tests it has been decided that I will have another round of chemo instead of having surgery right away. This is just about polar opposite of my last post (notice the gap in dates). During my recovery from the liver resection, which is still progressing, I had another ct scan to see how things were going. I also has blood work to check both liver function and cancer markers. All of these tests came back just about perfect. On paper, I'm clean! However my oncologist explained it like this:
95% of the cancer is in the primary (my colon)
4% is in the secondary (my liver)
But it's the last 1% (like little seeds) that's floating around your system looking for a place to land that kills you...
He pointed out that there is no evidence that I even have these seeds, however, it's important to make every attempt to distroy them if we can. Therefore I'm doing another round of chemo before surgery. It will be totally different drugs this time. I'll have a pill based chemo I take daily, and an infusion every other Thursday. This will not be an all day infusion like the last time. It's only an hour or two...
It's been just over five weeks since the resection surgery. I went back to work on Thursday. What a wonderful feeling to get some sort of semblance of normality! It's been a little difficult to get
My head back into it, but it will get there.
Once again, I am amazed and blessed by how well things are going. Who would have believed I could get this far this quickly? I still have several challages both with chemo and surgery. There are potential side effects with the new drugs I may need to deal with, but we'll see. I may skate right through! Only time will tell...
My son (11 years old) is playing hockey on the Holland Ice Dogs house team. It's been a blast watching him play. I don't normally doing this sort of thing, but I want to point out how great The Edge Ice Arena is. (I ended that sentence in a preposition!). When they found out what was happening to me, they bent over backwards to make sure Calvin could play. I am very greatful for the kind gestures they have made. Many many others have gone out if their way to assist us as well.. I thank you all, and love you all!
Mike
95% of the cancer is in the primary (my colon)
4% is in the secondary (my liver)
But it's the last 1% (like little seeds) that's floating around your system looking for a place to land that kills you...
He pointed out that there is no evidence that I even have these seeds, however, it's important to make every attempt to distroy them if we can. Therefore I'm doing another round of chemo before surgery. It will be totally different drugs this time. I'll have a pill based chemo I take daily, and an infusion every other Thursday. This will not be an all day infusion like the last time. It's only an hour or two...
It's been just over five weeks since the resection surgery. I went back to work on Thursday. What a wonderful feeling to get some sort of semblance of normality! It's been a little difficult to get
My head back into it, but it will get there.
Once again, I am amazed and blessed by how well things are going. Who would have believed I could get this far this quickly? I still have several challages both with chemo and surgery. There are potential side effects with the new drugs I may need to deal with, but we'll see. I may skate right through! Only time will tell...
My son (11 years old) is playing hockey on the Holland Ice Dogs house team. It's been a blast watching him play. I don't normally doing this sort of thing, but I want to point out how great The Edge Ice Arena is. (I ended that sentence in a preposition!). When they found out what was happening to me, they bent over backwards to make sure Calvin could play. I am very greatful for the kind gestures they have made. Many many others have gone out if their way to assist us as well.. I thank you all, and love you all!
Mike
Sunday, September 28, 2014
A major change in plans!!!
Well recovery is going pretty good. I'm still hurting, but the incision is healing up fairly well. I went to see the oncologist in Thursday. When he walked in, he was reviewing my case. After a few, he looked up and said "wow, you're making this look easy!" That's a pretty cool thin to hear from your doctor when, at one point, you were given 18 months to 2 years... I asked him about a remark the oncology surgeons PA said. She said "you've taken a strange path to getting here." At the time I didn't bother to have her clarify. When I asked Dr Campbell, he just smiled and said he wasn't really sure, but maybe she was alluding to the fact that not too many years ago, they wouldn't have done anything with my case. I would have been considered too far gone....
My how things change. The original plan was 12 rounds of chemo, liver recection, more chemo, colon reception, more chemo, microwave oblation on liver. Dr Campbell has decided to change things up a bit, based on my body's response so far. I've already had the 12 chemo treatments, and 70% of my liver removed, but instead of more chemo, I'm going right back to surgery after I'm healed up from the liver. (4 to 6 weeks). At that point, I may not even need more chemo!
That's the best news I've gotten in a long time. I was dreading going back to the drugs. Dr Campbell loves to use analogies. Being that the MLB postseason is around the corner, this is what he used to explain my situation. "Chemo got you the first base. The liver was second. We take the colon to get you to third, and you're staring at home."
One of the reasons for the change in plans is based on what the geneticist found. I do have a known gene mutation. Oddly enough, it's one that up until a couple of years ago, they didn't even look for it in men. They didn't think we could get it. In women it generally shows up as breast cancer, and men as either colon or prostrate. This is good and bad news. On the bad news side, obviously, is that my kids have a high probability of having this mutation as well. The good news is we know about it, so we can watch out. Also, this particular one is easier to beat than most.
They are going t send off some of my living tumor cells to a group that will test it against all 298 known cancer fighting drugs. This targeted therapy circumvents one of the hurdles the FDA puts up. Using this method, I can be prescribed any drug that shows it will re
Act, even if the FDA never approved it for colon cancer. I may not even need this, but it's nice to have a ace up the sleeve!!!
My sister and parents will need to have this genetics test run now as well to see where it started, and whether or not my cousins (on one side or the other need to be warned) it would be easiest if the mutation started with me, and no one else needs to worry about it. We'll see.
A lot more has happened over the past couple of weeks, but this is the highlights. Maybe I'll throw out a bit more later...
Again, thanks for all the prayers, and help that we've received in so many ways!!!
My how things change. The original plan was 12 rounds of chemo, liver recection, more chemo, colon reception, more chemo, microwave oblation on liver. Dr Campbell has decided to change things up a bit, based on my body's response so far. I've already had the 12 chemo treatments, and 70% of my liver removed, but instead of more chemo, I'm going right back to surgery after I'm healed up from the liver. (4 to 6 weeks). At that point, I may not even need more chemo!
That's the best news I've gotten in a long time. I was dreading going back to the drugs. Dr Campbell loves to use analogies. Being that the MLB postseason is around the corner, this is what he used to explain my situation. "Chemo got you the first base. The liver was second. We take the colon to get you to third, and you're staring at home."
One of the reasons for the change in plans is based on what the geneticist found. I do have a known gene mutation. Oddly enough, it's one that up until a couple of years ago, they didn't even look for it in men. They didn't think we could get it. In women it generally shows up as breast cancer, and men as either colon or prostrate. This is good and bad news. On the bad news side, obviously, is that my kids have a high probability of having this mutation as well. The good news is we know about it, so we can watch out. Also, this particular one is easier to beat than most.
They are going t send off some of my living tumor cells to a group that will test it against all 298 known cancer fighting drugs. This targeted therapy circumvents one of the hurdles the FDA puts up. Using this method, I can be prescribed any drug that shows it will re
Act, even if the FDA never approved it for colon cancer. I may not even need this, but it's nice to have a ace up the sleeve!!!
My sister and parents will need to have this genetics test run now as well to see where it started, and whether or not my cousins (on one side or the other need to be warned) it would be easiest if the mutation started with me, and no one else needs to worry about it. We'll see.
A lot more has happened over the past couple of weeks, but this is the highlights. Maybe I'll throw out a bit more later...
Again, thanks for all the prayers, and help that we've received in so many ways!!!
Thursday, September 18, 2014
Be gone with you, liver!
Ok, so here's the latest. The surgery was considered a success. They removed the entire right lobe, my gallbladder, and a large portion of my left lobe. (70% of my liver in total) That's more than they had originally planned, but the feel really confident that they got all of the cancer with the exception of the one tumor that has to be zapped electrically. They actually call the procedure "microwave oblation" I'm not sure how Vinney Johnson was involved...
That procedure with have to wait for another day. They used a chevron a shaped incision. Its about 2 FEET wide! There a 22 sutures holding is shut. It looks pretty horrible. I've been sleeping a ton lately. They have me in some pretty heavy narcotics right now. So I swing back a forth between so stoned, u can barely talk, and do much pain, I can barley talk. (guess which one I like better!)
The geneticist came in to talk to me in the hospital. If you recall, there were a series of tests that they wanted to run to see if I had a predisposed mutation that would have led to all
of this. Turns out that the answer is yes, but in a somewhat surprising way. I came up positive on a marker that they have only been testing in men as of vert recently. They only saw this one in women with breast cancer in the past, but now are seeing it in men with prostrate and colon cancer. That still does not mean this is how I got it, they will never know for sure, but now that u have the mutation, my sister and parents need to be checked. I may be the "patient 0" or it could have come from father up the line. My parent need to be check so the proper set of cousins are warned. It's very possible that no one else will have this mutation, and even if they do, it's not a guarantee of getting cancer. So we'll wait and see on that one.
I meet with the surgeon next week to get passed back to the oncologist. Still need colon surgery and that last liver procedure. And more chemo... Overall, things are going pretty good. Better than expected. Thanks for all the prayers. I'm doing so much better than I deserve though all this.
Cheers!
That procedure with have to wait for another day. They used a chevron a shaped incision. Its about 2 FEET wide! There a 22 sutures holding is shut. It looks pretty horrible. I've been sleeping a ton lately. They have me in some pretty heavy narcotics right now. So I swing back a forth between so stoned, u can barely talk, and do much pain, I can barley talk. (guess which one I like better!)
The geneticist came in to talk to me in the hospital. If you recall, there were a series of tests that they wanted to run to see if I had a predisposed mutation that would have led to all
of this. Turns out that the answer is yes, but in a somewhat surprising way. I came up positive on a marker that they have only been testing in men as of vert recently. They only saw this one in women with breast cancer in the past, but now are seeing it in men with prostrate and colon cancer. That still does not mean this is how I got it, they will never know for sure, but now that u have the mutation, my sister and parents need to be checked. I may be the "patient 0" or it could have come from father up the line. My parent need to be check so the proper set of cousins are warned. It's very possible that no one else will have this mutation, and even if they do, it's not a guarantee of getting cancer. So we'll wait and see on that one.
I meet with the surgeon next week to get passed back to the oncologist. Still need colon surgery and that last liver procedure. And more chemo... Overall, things are going pretty good. Better than expected. Thanks for all the prayers. I'm doing so much better than I deserve though all this.
Cheers!
Thursday, August 21, 2014
Good news, bad news.... Same old song and dance
So here's the latest. I met with the oncology surgeon yesterday. (This is the same guy that i met when I was in the hospital for 4 days. He's the guy who said 18 months to 2 years! By the way, he doesn't remember me...) Anyway, he gave me the results of the PET/CT I had a few weeks back.
For those you do not understand what the difference is between a PET scan and a CT scan, I'll give a brief description. A CT scan show anatomy. I sees a mass or bone, or organ; you know, your innards! I can show you the exact location of the tumors. What is cannot do is show you the the tumor is doing. That's where PET comes in. Its job is to show function. (It works on other stuff besides tumors, by the way.) In my case, I was injected with radioactive glucose (sugar). This isotope is like Brawndo, it's got what tumors crave! The sugar is absorbed by a healthy tumor (it eats it) This makes the tumors glow in the scan. That's where the good news comes in: my tumors didn't glow!!! That doesn't mean they're dead (they could be), but it does mean they aren't eating. So they are either in the process of dying, dormant... I'll take either if those!
There are several small tumors on my liver. Most of them are on the right lobe. The docs say they are going to take all of my right lobe and my gallbladder. That kind of stinks to lose the gallbladder as collateral damage, but that's the way it goes...
That's not the bad news, though. The really bad news the on the left lobe. I have a couple of small tumors on that side as well. two of them are not an issue, the other one is extremely close to the main vein that drains your liver. If that gets cut, or plugged up, you die. Period. So that means they cannot cut it with a scalpel, use a laser, or radiation. All of those have inherit risks that are too great to take a chance. It's not all bad though. Lemmen-Holton happens to be one of only 12 places in America (so the doc says) that has this electric probe that they insert into the tumor and electrocute it to death. Sounds like fun, right?
So here is the order of events...
9/11/2014 - liver recection
4 to 7 days in the hospital. After that, I'll be off work for about a month.
?/?/2014 (i hope) colon surgery. more time off work, or at least a weight restriction.
After that the electric shock therapy.
After that, more chemo. At least six months worth. (oh joy)
So chemo worked well. It did exactly what it was supposed to do. Now the surgeons get to show their stuff.
Oh, one more thing: They are having me see a geneticist. They want to see if I have a gene or DNA mutation that caused this. This is important more for my kids than me. If this is something they can get, we want to catch it super early!
Thanks again for all the prayers, kind words, help at home, support and love. I am deeply moved by all the generosity that has surrounded us. Along those lines, the Edge Ice Arena insisted that we sign up Calvin for their in-house hockey league. (whether we can afford it or not, they said not to worry about the money) So make sure you go out and skate on a Saturday open skate day, or have a skate party!
For those you do not understand what the difference is between a PET scan and a CT scan, I'll give a brief description. A CT scan show anatomy. I sees a mass or bone, or organ; you know, your innards! I can show you the exact location of the tumors. What is cannot do is show you the the tumor is doing. That's where PET comes in. Its job is to show function. (It works on other stuff besides tumors, by the way.) In my case, I was injected with radioactive glucose (sugar). This isotope is like Brawndo, it's got what tumors crave! The sugar is absorbed by a healthy tumor (it eats it) This makes the tumors glow in the scan. That's where the good news comes in: my tumors didn't glow!!! That doesn't mean they're dead (they could be), but it does mean they aren't eating. So they are either in the process of dying, dormant... I'll take either if those!There are several small tumors on my liver. Most of them are on the right lobe. The docs say they are going to take all of my right lobe and my gallbladder. That kind of stinks to lose the gallbladder as collateral damage, but that's the way it goes...
That's not the bad news, though. The really bad news the on the left lobe. I have a couple of small tumors on that side as well. two of them are not an issue, the other one is extremely close to the main vein that drains your liver. If that gets cut, or plugged up, you die. Period. So that means they cannot cut it with a scalpel, use a laser, or radiation. All of those have inherit risks that are too great to take a chance. It's not all bad though. Lemmen-Holton happens to be one of only 12 places in America (so the doc says) that has this electric probe that they insert into the tumor and electrocute it to death. Sounds like fun, right?
So here is the order of events...
9/11/2014 - liver recection
4 to 7 days in the hospital. After that, I'll be off work for about a month.
?/?/2014 (i hope) colon surgery. more time off work, or at least a weight restriction.
After that the electric shock therapy.
After that, more chemo. At least six months worth. (oh joy)
So chemo worked well. It did exactly what it was supposed to do. Now the surgeons get to show their stuff.
Oh, one more thing: They are having me see a geneticist. They want to see if I have a gene or DNA mutation that caused this. This is important more for my kids than me. If this is something they can get, we want to catch it super early!
Thanks again for all the prayers, kind words, help at home, support and love. I am deeply moved by all the generosity that has surrounded us. Along those lines, the Edge Ice Arena insisted that we sign up Calvin for their in-house hockey league. (whether we can afford it or not, they said not to worry about the money) So make sure you go out and skate on a Saturday open skate day, or have a skate party!
Sunday, August 17, 2014
Just some observations...
There are many things in life that people argue over. Democrat vs republican, Sunni vs Shiite, coke vs Pepsi, Mary Ann vs ginger the list goes on and on. On the other there are some things everybody knows: Strawberry jelly is better than grape, a medium rare steak is the best way to cook it, the Scorpions were the best metal band of the 80's, the 1949 chevy fleetmaster deluxe is the coolest car ever, and if you get 50% of your liver removed, it will grow back after a week or two.
Ok, some of those facts might be my personal opinions, bit the liver thing is real! It amazes A d and delights me that this is so. I'm going to have the right love on my live basically removed... That's a little scary, as you might imagine, but I take a lot of comfort that is come back on its own with no drugs and weird procedures. It's like are own salamander tail.
I've tried to keep my reading about cancer to a minimum. There are a voile reasons for this. First and foremost is because most of the information is not good. A great deal of the info says I have five or so tears. I choose to say "no" to that. I'm on the far right side of the bell curve so far, and I choose to stay there. Another reason is that I want to listen to my doctors, if I start playing doc myself, I may stop listening to what they say. As Steve Martin said on Saturday Night Live, "who's the barber here?" (If you don't know that reference comes from, get on the googles and look it up. It's quite humorous!)
I've learned many this this year. Some have been beneficial other I wish I didn't know. Either way, it's been quite an adventure. I an on pulling through this, buck all the odds. Will I succeed? Beats me, but as I've said probably a hundred times this year: "I can't quantify how much a positive attitude has on my success, but I know if I think I'm going to die, I'll be right!"
Ok, some of those facts might be my personal opinions, bit the liver thing is real! It amazes A d and delights me that this is so. I'm going to have the right love on my live basically removed... That's a little scary, as you might imagine, but I take a lot of comfort that is come back on its own with no drugs and weird procedures. It's like are own salamander tail.
I've tried to keep my reading about cancer to a minimum. There are a voile reasons for this. First and foremost is because most of the information is not good. A great deal of the info says I have five or so tears. I choose to say "no" to that. I'm on the far right side of the bell curve so far, and I choose to stay there. Another reason is that I want to listen to my doctors, if I start playing doc myself, I may stop listening to what they say. As Steve Martin said on Saturday Night Live, "who's the barber here?" (If you don't know that reference comes from, get on the googles and look it up. It's quite humorous!)
I've learned many this this year. Some have been beneficial other I wish I didn't know. Either way, it's been quite an adventure. I an on pulling through this, buck all the odds. Will I succeed? Beats me, but as I've said probably a hundred times this year: "I can't quantify how much a positive attitude has on my success, but I know if I think I'm going to die, I'll be right!"
Thursday, August 14, 2014
The end is nigh!!! Actually it's just time for surgery
Had my appointment with the oncologist today, and I got the lowdown on what coming next. First if all my cancer markers from my last blood test were amazing. One is down to 47 (from 2050) and the other is a 3.1 (which is considered to be "normal")! Very happy with that news....
Next, I found out what kind of surgery they plan to do. They plan to remover the whole right side of my liver! He said my left love was larger than average so it shouldn't be a big issue with recovery. He said there are no long term affects.
It will be a second surgery to remove part of my colon. That will be 4 to 6 weeks later. NO COLOSTOMY BAG. (Yay!)
I still don't have a date for surgery. I have another appointment; this time with the oncology surgeon. That will determine the date, but it wil be within the next week or two. We will just have to wait until there's a spot in the schedule.
This is about as good of news as we could have prayed for! God is good.
Next, I found out what kind of surgery they plan to do. They plan to remover the whole right side of my liver! He said my left love was larger than average so it shouldn't be a big issue with recovery. He said there are no long term affects.
It will be a second surgery to remove part of my colon. That will be 4 to 6 weeks later. NO COLOSTOMY BAG. (Yay!)
I still don't have a date for surgery. I have another appointment; this time with the oncology surgeon. That will determine the date, but it wil be within the next week or two. We will just have to wait until there's a spot in the schedule.
This is about as good of news as we could have prayed for! God is good.
Friday, July 25, 2014
Last round of chemo is over!
Been a while since I wrote something... I'm in the process (wearing the pump) of finishing my last chemo treatment for now. I have a PET/CT on Monday. There's a 25 person panel up at Lemmen-Holten that looks over the cases before surgery. They will look over mine in two weeks. Surgery could be any time after that... I was told yesterday that I will have more chemo after I heal up from whatever they decide to do. I was a little bummed to head about more chemo. But if that what has to happen, so be it....
I met a really cool guy while u was getting my treatment yesterday. He's a 5 year survivor of pancreatic cancer (very rare to make it that long) and he still is in great shape. His CA19-9 marker is in the low 30's and that's a fantastic number! His attitude was amazing. He came over to try to cheer me up. He was telling me about what keeps him motivated; he has a 7 year old daughter. Sound familiar? Anyway, it's almost like a fraternity in there. Everybody shares their stories very openly. No food fights so far. Maybe when I go back.
I know I've said it before, but those nurses in the oncology ward are cut from a very special cloth. That have to remain so positive no matter what is happening. My nurse (Wendy) is amazing. I will request that I get her back next time. We took the kids up there this time to meet everybody. They were really well behaved.
Not sure when I'll update again. There won't be much to say until the doctors get back to me.
Thanks for all the encouragement!
Cheers!
I met a really cool guy while u was getting my treatment yesterday. He's a 5 year survivor of pancreatic cancer (very rare to make it that long) and he still is in great shape. His CA19-9 marker is in the low 30's and that's a fantastic number! His attitude was amazing. He came over to try to cheer me up. He was telling me about what keeps him motivated; he has a 7 year old daughter. Sound familiar? Anyway, it's almost like a fraternity in there. Everybody shares their stories very openly. No food fights so far. Maybe when I go back.
I know I've said it before, but those nurses in the oncology ward are cut from a very special cloth. That have to remain so positive no matter what is happening. My nurse (Wendy) is amazing. I will request that I get her back next time. We took the kids up there this time to meet everybody. They were really well behaved.
Not sure when I'll update again. There won't be much to say until the doctors get back to me.
Thanks for all the encouragement!
Cheers!
Friday, June 27, 2014
4 more weeks of chemo!
10 down 2 to go.... I sitting in the living room of my parents cottage in Greenville right now. Everybody else is sleeping. Even the dogs.... I had my treatment yesterday, and it went pretty good, I still have the pump until Saturday morning.
We came up here for Abi's birthday in a couple of days. Today is Angela's and my 16th anniversary! Hard to imagine that that much time has passed. I guess when you marry the help-meet that God made for you things like time become irrelevant. It's been a good run so far...
After talking the the nurses yesterday about the surgery details (as much as they could give me), I found out that surgery is going to be at the end of August at the earliest. That becuase I need to come down from the chemo a bit before
They start hacking out bits. Looking at probably 8 weeks of recovery...
We came up here for Abi's birthday in a couple of days. Today is Angela's and my 16th anniversary! Hard to imagine that that much time has passed. I guess when you marry the help-meet that God made for you things like time become irrelevant. It's been a good run so far...
After talking the the nurses yesterday about the surgery details (as much as they could give me), I found out that surgery is going to be at the end of August at the earliest. That becuase I need to come down from the chemo a bit before
They start hacking out bits. Looking at probably 8 weeks of recovery...
Friday, June 13, 2014
Got the results from my CT scan yesterday.
If we're Facebook friends, you already know this... But I had chemo treatment number 9. 3 more to go! I also met the my doctor. He said the ALL of the tumors are shrinking. Some of the numbers were from 3.7 cm to 2.6 cm. all of them were similar to that. So the game plan is complete the 3 chemo treatments, then a CT and a PET scan, then surgery. The plan at the moment is the cut out the whatever tumors are left in my liver with a laser (not on a sharks head that I'm aware off), and at the same time fix the colon. (Probably some lymph nodes too, but he didn't say that...)
So things are going really well. In fact last night was only the second night I've lost sleep over this, but this time it was because of excitement...
God is good.
Cheers!
So things are going really well. In fact last night was only the second night I've lost sleep over this, but this time it was because of excitement...
God is good.
Cheers!
Friday, May 30, 2014
8 down. Next up: CT scan.
Sill have the pump on from number 8, but feel remarkably well so far. Still tired all the time, of course but that's part of the gig. In a week it so, I get a CT to really see how thing are going. I am optimistic that there will be great progress. I'm not expecting them to say I'm cured or anything like that, but I do think there has been real progress, and I'm just looking for confirmation....
I cannot overstate how well this has gone so far. That not to say that it really stinks at times, or that it hasn't been the biggest challenge of my life. Compared to what I thought this would be, it's been almost a breeze. God has seen me though so far, and I expect the same going forward.
Short update this time, but not a lot to say. Thanks for all the encouraging words, and prayers! That's the best thing people can do for me at this time.
Cheers!
I cannot overstate how well this has gone so far. That not to say that it really stinks at times, or that it hasn't been the biggest challenge of my life. Compared to what I thought this would be, it's been almost a breeze. God has seen me though so far, and I expect the same going forward.
Short update this time, but not a lot to say. Thanks for all the encouraging words, and prayers! That's the best thing people can do for me at this time.
Cheers!
Wednesday, May 21, 2014
Whoops!
I broke my pump last Friday night. Spilled chemo all over my coat. The craziest part is that I got it on my hands, and it burns the skin! Pretty freaky to put something INSIDE you that is that caustic... I'm feeling pretty good this week (probably because I missed out on some if my dosage.) the bad news in all of that it they will probably give me extra next time...
We'll just have to wait and see. One more treatment before the new tests. I know that things are shrinking, I can actually feel it! If I jogged a little a few weeks ago, I could feel the tumor rubbing against my abdominal wall. I noticed last week that I can no longer feel it! So hopefully the same thing that's happening to my colon is happening to my liver... Once again, we'll just have to wait and see.
Short post this time. Gotta go to work!
We'll just have to wait and see. One more treatment before the new tests. I know that things are shrinking, I can actually feel it! If I jogged a little a few weeks ago, I could feel the tumor rubbing against my abdominal wall. I noticed last week that I can no longer feel it! So hopefully the same thing that's happening to my colon is happening to my liver... Once again, we'll just have to wait and see.
Short post this time. Gotta go to work!
Saturday, May 3, 2014
Half way! And my first complication...
I've had several people give me a hard time for not posting anything for so long... Frankly, there hadn't been anything to say! Everything had been just about picture perfect. (At least for what you can expect on chemo!)
So treatment number six is over. I got the pump removed this morning. As I said above, I hadn't posted anything, because there was nothing say... Well so much for that! First off, I am officially half way through this round! 6 of 12. Secondly, I had my first scary moment during this past treatment. I was about an hour into everything, and I started to get tightness in my diaphragm area, at the same time my hands started to itch really bad, and my head (under my hair) broke out in hives. My scalp felt like a golf ball, it was so lumpy! Angela had just gotten back from taking Morgan, out friends kid, to the bathroom or something. We had Morgan with because of a family emergency for them. She's an absolute doll! Anyway, when Angela got back she could she something was wrong immediately. My face was flush, and I'm sure I had an strange expression in my face. She called for the nurse, and they reacted very quickly.
It wasn't the first time they had seen this. I has an allergic reaction to the meds, they gave me a shot of Benadryl, a steroid, and avastin (I think that what it was called). Anyway, it worked the hives went away, and all the other symptoms. Of course the Benadryl, put me out like a light. I slept thru the rest of the treatment. They are going to give me those meds every time from now on. Which means I'll be passing out at every one... Not real happy about that. I don't like that feeling, and I'm not one that likes to sleep the day away...
Anyway, all's well that ends well, as they say. I'm feeling pretty good right now, just waiting for some warmer weather. This cool/cold spring is the pits!
Thanks for all the encouraging words, prayers and comments.
Cheers!
So treatment number six is over. I got the pump removed this morning. As I said above, I hadn't posted anything, because there was nothing say... Well so much for that! First off, I am officially half way through this round! 6 of 12. Secondly, I had my first scary moment during this past treatment. I was about an hour into everything, and I started to get tightness in my diaphragm area, at the same time my hands started to itch really bad, and my head (under my hair) broke out in hives. My scalp felt like a golf ball, it was so lumpy! Angela had just gotten back from taking Morgan, out friends kid, to the bathroom or something. We had Morgan with because of a family emergency for them. She's an absolute doll! Anyway, when Angela got back she could she something was wrong immediately. My face was flush, and I'm sure I had an strange expression in my face. She called for the nurse, and they reacted very quickly.
It wasn't the first time they had seen this. I has an allergic reaction to the meds, they gave me a shot of Benadryl, a steroid, and avastin (I think that what it was called). Anyway, it worked the hives went away, and all the other symptoms. Of course the Benadryl, put me out like a light. I slept thru the rest of the treatment. They are going to give me those meds every time from now on. Which means I'll be passing out at every one... Not real happy about that. I don't like that feeling, and I'm not one that likes to sleep the day away...
Anyway, all's well that ends well, as they say. I'm feeling pretty good right now, just waiting for some warmer weather. This cool/cold spring is the pits!
Thanks for all the encouraging words, prayers and comments.
Cheers!
Friday, April 4, 2014
Thursday, April 3, 2014
Number 4 is in the bag. (literally)
Chemo session number four is done! Except I still have the bag stuck in my chest... (Gross, I know) I'll be completely done Saturday morning. Today went well. I love the nurse that takes care of me. Not only is she a great nurse, but she has a great sense of humor, and is just pleasant to talk to... I don't remember if I mentioned it in the last post, and I'm too lazy to go back and look, but she's the one who suggested that I take Prilosec OTC, and a B-complex vitamin. It made such an amazing difference! I'm hoping for a similar result this time around...
My dad came over and watched the kids when they got off the bus until we came home. I know they were really psyched to see him. It was cool that he stayed for dinner, too. I think this is a good time to mention that there's a group of ladies from Benthiem making dinners on the chemo days... I know SEVERAL people have offered to help out, and we have politely declined for now... I am truly astounded by the outpouring of support. There may be a day where we need to cash in some of those offers, but at the moment we doing better than I could have ever imagined! God is good.
I do feel bad about one thing right now... I upset my dad a little today. He had an incredible sense of humor about pretty much everything. He has a joke for every occasion... Except this... I was running through my gambit of cancer jokes, and stories about what I've experienced, and I didn't put much thought into what he might think about this. I am his boy after all. I should have just shut up, but I don't have a very good filter for such things... I can count the number of times I've seen my dad really sad on one hand. In my life. I have to add one more today.
This is probably the worst part of all this. I hate seeing everybody getting sad, or upset by my situation... I'm handling better than some of my friends and family... You wouldn't believe how many people I have to talk off the ledge! I've also gotten a bit of a laugh about how people yell at me for not knowing I had this condition earlier... (If I knew, I would have done something about it!)
Anyway, Things are going pretty good. I'll be tired tomorrow, but if things are like last week, I'll be able to carry on. Thanks for all the support, people. Thanks for the offers of assistance. Thanks for the prayers, and positive thoughts.
Cheers!
My dad came over and watched the kids when they got off the bus until we came home. I know they were really psyched to see him. It was cool that he stayed for dinner, too. I think this is a good time to mention that there's a group of ladies from Benthiem making dinners on the chemo days... I know SEVERAL people have offered to help out, and we have politely declined for now... I am truly astounded by the outpouring of support. There may be a day where we need to cash in some of those offers, but at the moment we doing better than I could have ever imagined! God is good.
I do feel bad about one thing right now... I upset my dad a little today. He had an incredible sense of humor about pretty much everything. He has a joke for every occasion... Except this... I was running through my gambit of cancer jokes, and stories about what I've experienced, and I didn't put much thought into what he might think about this. I am his boy after all. I should have just shut up, but I don't have a very good filter for such things... I can count the number of times I've seen my dad really sad on one hand. In my life. I have to add one more today.
This is probably the worst part of all this. I hate seeing everybody getting sad, or upset by my situation... I'm handling better than some of my friends and family... You wouldn't believe how many people I have to talk off the ledge! I've also gotten a bit of a laugh about how people yell at me for not knowing I had this condition earlier... (If I knew, I would have done something about it!)
Anyway, Things are going pretty good. I'll be tired tomorrow, but if things are like last week, I'll be able to carry on. Thanks for all the support, people. Thanks for the offers of assistance. Thanks for the prayers, and positive thoughts.
Cheers!
Thursday, March 27, 2014
The funny thing is......
I am surprised at how many compliments I get for my writing... I failed 11th grade English not once, but twice, and I had to go to night school to graduate... I guess I'm a late bloomer.. I wish my English teacher was till here, unfortunately he lost his battle with cancer right around the time I found out about mine. I wish I would have reached out to him. When I was 17, I couldn't stand him. He was trying to push me, to help me achieve. I was still in idiot mode, so all I did was push back. I still regret that 22 years later...
I wen t to the oncologist today. It was a nice visit. There were no tests before hand, so I knew it was mostly a formality... He poked around my stomach, and talked about how cancer can take multiple forms, but the thought we were on the right track. He asked me how I felt now compared to BEFORE I started chemo. I told him that my stomach is much better now, and I said "I guess that the chemo shrinking the tumor?" He said "Oh, certainly!" I noticed a change in his disposition after that. He was genuinely happy, and so was I. Nothing like a happy doctor!
He told me that my CT scan will be after my 8th chemo treatment. That means I'll be half way after next Thursday. He also said that he was looking forward to how good the results were. I said I like the way you think! I'm looking for the same thing. He got serious for a moment and said "I mean it, I expect good thing when we do the scan!" That was all I needed to hear. I'm happy that he is happy....
This last round of chemo was a breeze! The nurse suggested that I start taking Prilosec and a B-complex vitamin. All I know is that I feel much, much better this time around, and I have very expensive urine... But, whatever works!!! I told Calvin that the doctor was really happy with whats going on, and he was really happy to hear that,
It's hard on the kids to go through this. Angela and I just soldier though like we're supposed to, but the kids still freak out every now and then.. I can't blame them, I never dealt with anything like this. I watched my grandpa die when I was 10 or 11... I can't remember exactly, but your grandpa and dad are two different things. I was very sad, but I didn't even cry when he died... I know it will be very different when MY dad passes on. That's the natural progression. A son is supposed to bury his father not the father bury the son...
Anyways, enough doom and gloom. Doc says all is going well, I say all is going well. Heck, I haven't even missed much work! I pulled a service call straight from chemo last Thursday. Freaked that customer out... God is good. That's all there is to it. If you're a believer, you know what I'm talking about, if not; well... There's still time...
There's no way you can have so much peace about such a serious situation without faith! I don't usually go for the beat you over the head method, but I mean it...I've lost exactly one night of sleep over this ordeal. Just one, and that was the night I was told I have two years! After that, I got my composure, and said to Angela "I can't wait to see how God gets me out of this one!" I mean it, too. I wait on God for an answer. I also trust my docs and nurses, and all the staff to do their jobs, but I have total piece about the ordeal I'm in...
God is good.
P.S.
I found a blog for a woman that had a very similar situation to mine. Take a look if you're so inclined...
http://karenscancer.blogspot.com/
Cheers!
I wen t to the oncologist today. It was a nice visit. There were no tests before hand, so I knew it was mostly a formality... He poked around my stomach, and talked about how cancer can take multiple forms, but the thought we were on the right track. He asked me how I felt now compared to BEFORE I started chemo. I told him that my stomach is much better now, and I said "I guess that the chemo shrinking the tumor?" He said "Oh, certainly!" I noticed a change in his disposition after that. He was genuinely happy, and so was I. Nothing like a happy doctor!
He told me that my CT scan will be after my 8th chemo treatment. That means I'll be half way after next Thursday. He also said that he was looking forward to how good the results were. I said I like the way you think! I'm looking for the same thing. He got serious for a moment and said "I mean it, I expect good thing when we do the scan!" That was all I needed to hear. I'm happy that he is happy....
This last round of chemo was a breeze! The nurse suggested that I start taking Prilosec and a B-complex vitamin. All I know is that I feel much, much better this time around, and I have very expensive urine... But, whatever works!!! I told Calvin that the doctor was really happy with whats going on, and he was really happy to hear that,
It's hard on the kids to go through this. Angela and I just soldier though like we're supposed to, but the kids still freak out every now and then.. I can't blame them, I never dealt with anything like this. I watched my grandpa die when I was 10 or 11... I can't remember exactly, but your grandpa and dad are two different things. I was very sad, but I didn't even cry when he died... I know it will be very different when MY dad passes on. That's the natural progression. A son is supposed to bury his father not the father bury the son...
Anyways, enough doom and gloom. Doc says all is going well, I say all is going well. Heck, I haven't even missed much work! I pulled a service call straight from chemo last Thursday. Freaked that customer out... God is good. That's all there is to it. If you're a believer, you know what I'm talking about, if not; well... There's still time...
There's no way you can have so much peace about such a serious situation without faith! I don't usually go for the beat you over the head method, but I mean it...I've lost exactly one night of sleep over this ordeal. Just one, and that was the night I was told I have two years! After that, I got my composure, and said to Angela "I can't wait to see how God gets me out of this one!" I mean it, too. I wait on God for an answer. I also trust my docs and nurses, and all the staff to do their jobs, but I have total piece about the ordeal I'm in...
God is good.
P.S.
I found a blog for a woman that had a very similar situation to mine. Take a look if you're so inclined...
http://karenscancer.blogspot.com/
Cheers!
Thursday, March 20, 2014
3 is the magic number
Anybody remember that School House Rock song? I used to actually stop and listen to those, I can't say how much I learned from them but I know that the function of a conjunction is "hooking up words, phrases, and clauses!" They even made an album in the '90's of School House Rock cover tunes with the popular bands of the day. (I wasn't too excited about that)
Anyway, today is treatment Number three. I'm sorry for not updating more frequently, but truth be told, I can be pretty lazy. There hasn't been a whole bunch of new developments either, so at least I have an excuses! For the most part, it hasn't been to terrible to deal with. I get hooked up on a Thursday, go back on Saturday to get it removed, and then basically laze around and sleep for the next two days. By Monday I'm feeling good enough to go to work (haven't missed a Friday either).
The cold sensitivity is the biggest problem, it really makes things difficult. I can't get the milk out of the refrigerator without a pair of gloves, I can't go outside without a hat, I can't wash my hand without waiting for the water to warm up. That can take a while depending on where you are. And by the way, do you know how you find out if it's warm enough? You keep sticking your finger in the cold water (that hurts!) until it's ok... To describe the sensation; you know how your pinky and ring finger feel when you hit your elbow? That's how whatever part of your body touches cold feels. It effects your feet on a cold floor (wear socks), the big one is food and drink. Nothing cold at all! No milk, certainly no ice cream, no ice water or iced tea, soda, you get the idea.
I am honestly not complaining. I have found my way around most of the problems, so far. A new side effect just showed up last weekend, though. They told me it would happen, but I had forgotten at first. The wrinkles on the back of my hands are getting darker. The creases on my palms will start doing this as well I am told. It no big deal, but if you see my hands, trust me that I have washed them! It looks like I have been working on the car engine, or something.
Anyway today, being the third treatment puts me at the quarter way point. It also means I'm in single digits on remaining sessions. I am happy to say both of those things!
On a personal note (like what part of this is not personal, right) Calvin has started to play 3 on 3 cross ice hockey. He has worked really hard to get to this point, and I am so proud of him. We got him a new (to him) pair of skates last weekend from Play It Again Sports. Only $20.00, so not bad, and they look really nice this time. The old one looked like garbage. Also the girlfriend is playing as well. Yes, my boy has a girlfriend already, and it is so cute to watch them awkwardly interact with each other... I was particularly proud of him last Sunday when we took her home from church, he waited outside the car in the cold for her to get her stuff for a while so he could open the door for her. (Lady's first, he told me later) I'm glad he's listening.
Andrea was on the front page of the Holland Sentinel last Wednesday. Just a small picture for being at the library during a special event, but it sure made her day!
Abi is as smart as ever, she is able to dig herself into and out of trouble with amazing ease with her quick wit. I have no idea where that comes from...
Well it's time for another adventure. I will try to be more diligent in update going forward. Thanks for all the prayers and support! You have no idea how much it means to me.
Anyway, today is treatment Number three. I'm sorry for not updating more frequently, but truth be told, I can be pretty lazy. There hasn't been a whole bunch of new developments either, so at least I have an excuses! For the most part, it hasn't been to terrible to deal with. I get hooked up on a Thursday, go back on Saturday to get it removed, and then basically laze around and sleep for the next two days. By Monday I'm feeling good enough to go to work (haven't missed a Friday either).
The cold sensitivity is the biggest problem, it really makes things difficult. I can't get the milk out of the refrigerator without a pair of gloves, I can't go outside without a hat, I can't wash my hand without waiting for the water to warm up. That can take a while depending on where you are. And by the way, do you know how you find out if it's warm enough? You keep sticking your finger in the cold water (that hurts!) until it's ok... To describe the sensation; you know how your pinky and ring finger feel when you hit your elbow? That's how whatever part of your body touches cold feels. It effects your feet on a cold floor (wear socks), the big one is food and drink. Nothing cold at all! No milk, certainly no ice cream, no ice water or iced tea, soda, you get the idea.
I am honestly not complaining. I have found my way around most of the problems, so far. A new side effect just showed up last weekend, though. They told me it would happen, but I had forgotten at first. The wrinkles on the back of my hands are getting darker. The creases on my palms will start doing this as well I am told. It no big deal, but if you see my hands, trust me that I have washed them! It looks like I have been working on the car engine, or something.
Anyway today, being the third treatment puts me at the quarter way point. It also means I'm in single digits on remaining sessions. I am happy to say both of those things!
On a personal note (like what part of this is not personal, right) Calvin has started to play 3 on 3 cross ice hockey. He has worked really hard to get to this point, and I am so proud of him. We got him a new (to him) pair of skates last weekend from Play It Again Sports. Only $20.00, so not bad, and they look really nice this time. The old one looked like garbage. Also the girlfriend is playing as well. Yes, my boy has a girlfriend already, and it is so cute to watch them awkwardly interact with each other... I was particularly proud of him last Sunday when we took her home from church, he waited outside the car in the cold for her to get her stuff for a while so he could open the door for her. (Lady's first, he told me later) I'm glad he's listening.
Andrea was on the front page of the Holland Sentinel last Wednesday. Just a small picture for being at the library during a special event, but it sure made her day!
Abi is as smart as ever, she is able to dig herself into and out of trouble with amazing ease with her quick wit. I have no idea where that comes from...
Well it's time for another adventure. I will try to be more diligent in update going forward. Thanks for all the prayers and support! You have no idea how much it means to me.
Saturday, February 22, 2014
A quick update
I had my pump removed this morning. I am very thankful for that! I had posted on Facebook that the side effects are not too bad, that was mostly true up to that point. However, I woke up at about 0300 in a lot of discomfort. Now sure what the deal was, but it was more or less a stomach ache... I ate some crackers and drank a bunch of water, and was able to get back to sleep around 0400. I felt pretty lousy all the way up to Grand Rapids and back. In fact I didn't feel better until a nice long nap this mid-morning/afternoon. Now I'm fine!
So overall the side effects that I have felt so far are the following:
- sensitive to cold. Hurts to touch cold things. Can't drink cold things. Even breathing cold air is uncomfortable (hurry up, spring!)
- the first bite of food hurt my molars all the way to my jawbone. It reminded me if having a new filling and touching a metal fork to it. The nurse said they hadn't heard that one before.
- I had a general feeling if light-headedness that I originally attributed to the chemo, I have since discovered that I took Tylenol PM instead of regular Tylenol! Oops... That might make a bit of difference...
Anyway, I still maintain that this isn't too bad as long as this the way it will be. I have found some other people with blogs similar to mine (not near as entertaining, though) as far as discovering their cancer at a later stage, and still conquering it. It helps to see that others have been down the same road, and knowing you are not blazing a completely new trail.
So overall the side effects that I have felt so far are the following:
- sensitive to cold. Hurts to touch cold things. Can't drink cold things. Even breathing cold air is uncomfortable (hurry up, spring!)
- the first bite of food hurt my molars all the way to my jawbone. It reminded me if having a new filling and touching a metal fork to it. The nurse said they hadn't heard that one before.
- I had a general feeling if light-headedness that I originally attributed to the chemo, I have since discovered that I took Tylenol PM instead of regular Tylenol! Oops... That might make a bit of difference...
Anyway, I still maintain that this isn't too bad as long as this the way it will be. I have found some other people with blogs similar to mine (not near as entertaining, though) as far as discovering their cancer at a later stage, and still conquering it. It helps to see that others have been down the same road, and knowing you are not blazing a completely new trail.
Thursday, February 20, 2014
First Chemo Treatment/Capt. Chemo
As I put as my Facebook status this afternoon. "Call me... Captain Chemo; cancer killer."
My first treatment is ok so far. It was very short notice getting in here today. Things moved along a little slowly because they kind of shoe-horned me into the schedule today. (My nurse today will not be my nurse for the rest of my treatments.) My biggest adverse reaction so far has been the Benadryl that they gave me as a precaution. Sometimes people have reaction to the first medicine they gave me (I can't remember the name.)
I hate Benadryl. It makes me very tired and light headed. Which is why people give it to their kids on long trips. We tried that once, but it had the opposite effect of what we wanted! They stayed awake all night in the car crying! Never gain...
Everyone has been very nice, and supportive. I even got to watch the last two periods of the USA/Canada gold medal women's hockey game. Too bad Canada won... This is one sport where the women's game is just as good as the men's (I know that sounds chauvinistic, but have you ever watched the WNBA? It's nothing like the mens game) The women play just as hard and fast as the men, just without the body checking. That being said, the refs didn't do the Americans any favors at the end of the game... The nurses kept coming by my station to ask how the game was going, and for details. I thought that was pretty cool, because no one even knew the game was on before I got here. I guess my enthusiasm was contagious.
This is the first session of 12. That takes me to the middle of July before it's over. I'm not exactly sure what comes after that. I'm sure there will be tests, and whatever to determine the next steps... I'm just happy to get going...
Captain Chemo signing off....
My first treatment is ok so far. It was very short notice getting in here today. Things moved along a little slowly because they kind of shoe-horned me into the schedule today. (My nurse today will not be my nurse for the rest of my treatments.) My biggest adverse reaction so far has been the Benadryl that they gave me as a precaution. Sometimes people have reaction to the first medicine they gave me (I can't remember the name.)
I hate Benadryl. It makes me very tired and light headed. Which is why people give it to their kids on long trips. We tried that once, but it had the opposite effect of what we wanted! They stayed awake all night in the car crying! Never gain...
Everyone has been very nice, and supportive. I even got to watch the last two periods of the USA/Canada gold medal women's hockey game. Too bad Canada won... This is one sport where the women's game is just as good as the men's (I know that sounds chauvinistic, but have you ever watched the WNBA? It's nothing like the mens game) The women play just as hard and fast as the men, just without the body checking. That being said, the refs didn't do the Americans any favors at the end of the game... The nurses kept coming by my station to ask how the game was going, and for details. I thought that was pretty cool, because no one even knew the game was on before I got here. I guess my enthusiasm was contagious.
This is the first session of 12. That takes me to the middle of July before it's over. I'm not exactly sure what comes after that. I'm sure there will be tests, and whatever to determine the next steps... I'm just happy to get going...
Captain Chemo signing off....
Tuesday, February 18, 2014
What a day may hold...
You never know where your day may take you. I had spent the previous three workdays (Thursday, Friday, and Monday) calling the Cancer Center asking for results or this particular test they were running because o my elevated CA19-9 level. Today, I just wanted to go to work
I was sick of asking, so I didn't make my traditional 9am call. I didn't make my 11:30am call (gotta catch 'em before lunch), I just went about my business doing service calls in Grand Rapids, and then Lansing. It wasn't until I finished my call in Lansing that I figured enough already, and called in. I called the main line, and was told a nurse would call me back. I called the number for the financial assistant that was assigned to me, but she didn't answer. I called several times within an hour. I got no where.
I finally got the call just before 5pm that is was colon cancer and NOT pancreatic cancer. I know I've said it before, but i feels weird to be thankful for colon cancer, but compared to the alternative, this is the best I could hope for!
I've remained pretty calm though out this whole affair. I've only lost sleep one night in the past month (that's how long I've known about this). I've said it before; I'm not afraid to die, but I fear for my family. I do not want my children to resent God because I "abandoned" them. So i have a lot to live for, and will continue to fight
tooth and nail as long as I can. For whatever reason I feel pretty confident that this is going to work out. I wish everyone else felt the same way.
Angela took Calvin to the doctor with an earache this morning, it's the same office that my primary doc resides in. Angela mentioned what was going on with me to her, so she looked up my charts (Spectrum is huge, ain't it?) I wish she would have had something encouraging to say. Instead she was asking Angela if my will was in order! Thank you so much! I choose to believe the oncologist, you know the guy who does this for a living, when he says I have a decent chance of beating this. Not the family physician who was just absorbing this for the first time, I'm not so naive to think that stage IV cancer is not a monumental obstacle to overcome, but I'm not accustomed to losing... I do not plan on losing here either!
I was sick of asking, so I didn't make my traditional 9am call. I didn't make my 11:30am call (gotta catch 'em before lunch), I just went about my business doing service calls in Grand Rapids, and then Lansing. It wasn't until I finished my call in Lansing that I figured enough already, and called in. I called the main line, and was told a nurse would call me back. I called the number for the financial assistant that was assigned to me, but she didn't answer. I called several times within an hour. I got no where.
I finally got the call just before 5pm that is was colon cancer and NOT pancreatic cancer. I know I've said it before, but i feels weird to be thankful for colon cancer, but compared to the alternative, this is the best I could hope for!
I've remained pretty calm though out this whole affair. I've only lost sleep one night in the past month (that's how long I've known about this). I've said it before; I'm not afraid to die, but I fear for my family. I do not want my children to resent God because I "abandoned" them. So i have a lot to live for, and will continue to fight
 | |
| This is what I fight for. Not the puppies... the people, don't be ridiculous | ! |
Angela took Calvin to the doctor with an earache this morning, it's the same office that my primary doc resides in. Angela mentioned what was going on with me to her, so she looked up my charts (Spectrum is huge, ain't it?) I wish she would have had something encouraging to say. Instead she was asking Angela if my will was in order! Thank you so much! I choose to believe the oncologist, you know the guy who does this for a living, when he says I have a decent chance of beating this. Not the family physician who was just absorbing this for the first time, I'm not so naive to think that stage IV cancer is not a monumental obstacle to overcome, but I'm not accustomed to losing... I do not plan on losing here either!
Monday, February 17, 2014
The reason for my long delay in posts (other than being lazy)
I was suppose to start chemo on last Thursday... That didn't happen. When I didn't get a call for a time, I started calling to see what was going on. I was told that the doc was still concerned about my CA19-9 level. This is carbohydrate antigen 19-9 according to wikipedia. It is elevated in people with pancreatic cancer. The doc says he couldn't ignore this even though the other tests were going my way. They are running some more tests on the biopsy material already collected... Oh snap! Guess what! Pancreatic cancer is back on the table... The good news is that there a several reasons for a false positive on the particular antigen. Such as:
"CA19-9 can be elevated in many types of gastrointestinal cancer, such as colorectal cancer, esophageal cancer and hepatocellular carcinoma.[1] Apart from cancer, elevated levels may also occur in pancreatitis, cirrhosis,[1] and diseases of the bile ducts.[1][5] It can be elevated in people with obstruction of the bile ducts.[5]"
So, I still l have no idea what is going on.. I didn't start chemo, I still (as of 1/17) have no idea what the results of the further tests are. What I do know is that you have to have the proper chemo for the type of cancer you have, So I need to be patient...
But that sucks...
"CA19-9 can be elevated in many types of gastrointestinal cancer, such as colorectal cancer, esophageal cancer and hepatocellular carcinoma.[1] Apart from cancer, elevated levels may also occur in pancreatitis, cirrhosis,[1] and diseases of the bile ducts.[1][5] It can be elevated in people with obstruction of the bile ducts.[5]"
So, I still l have no idea what is going on.. I didn't start chemo, I still (as of 1/17) have no idea what the results of the further tests are. What I do know is that you have to have the proper chemo for the type of cancer you have, So I need to be patient...
But that sucks...
The yo-yo continues to do it's thing...
Sorry for the delay. I'm almost caught up to the present... IF you know anyone who might want to know what's going on with my predicament, feel free to send them towards this blog. it is public, after all!
After the colonoscopy, we waited to meet with the nurses for consultation. This was the time to find out all the ins and outs of chemotherapy, and find out how to deal with them as best as possible. When we got there, the nurse was very pleasant, but the first thing she said was "Seeing that we have not determined to the origin of the cancer, we will need to discuss two possible solutions." I've always been a quick study so I didn't even need to asked to see that she meant they still thought pancreatic cancer was still on the table. I started to turn into a puddle at the bottom of my shoes right about then.
My wife Angela is much smarter that she, or anyone else, gives her credit. She could see across the table that to the date on the report that the nurse was reading from was three day prior to the colonoscopy results. She pointed it our before I could say anything. The nurse immediately stopped, and asked us to hold on for a moment while she left the room. he was gone for a while. When she came back, she oppoligzed for scaring us, and that "yes, the biopsy results were colon cancer."
I won't bore you with the details, but the short version is that I will probably be tired, I may get a little sick to my stomach, but no throwing up is allowed, I will be very sensitive to cold, and I cant go in the sun without SPF30... I didn't think that sounded too bad, really. I had to decide whether I wanted chemo on Wednesdays or Thursdays. I picked Thursday, and ws told I would start the following week. Once again, we left feeling pretty good!
After the colonoscopy, we waited to meet with the nurses for consultation. This was the time to find out all the ins and outs of chemotherapy, and find out how to deal with them as best as possible. When we got there, the nurse was very pleasant, but the first thing she said was "Seeing that we have not determined to the origin of the cancer, we will need to discuss two possible solutions." I've always been a quick study so I didn't even need to asked to see that she meant they still thought pancreatic cancer was still on the table. I started to turn into a puddle at the bottom of my shoes right about then.
My wife Angela is much smarter that she, or anyone else, gives her credit. She could see across the table that to the date on the report that the nurse was reading from was three day prior to the colonoscopy results. She pointed it our before I could say anything. The nurse immediately stopped, and asked us to hold on for a moment while she left the room. he was gone for a while. When she came back, she oppoligzed for scaring us, and that "yes, the biopsy results were colon cancer."
I won't bore you with the details, but the short version is that I will probably be tired, I may get a little sick to my stomach, but no throwing up is allowed, I will be very sensitive to cold, and I cant go in the sun without SPF30... I didn't think that sounded too bad, really. I had to decide whether I wanted chemo on Wednesdays or Thursdays. I picked Thursday, and ws told I would start the following week. Once again, we left feeling pretty good!
Tuesday, February 11, 2014
Darth Vader or Locutus of Borg
I'm a sci-fi nut. I love Star Trek, Star Wars (ep. IV, V & VI, of course), Firefly, and pretty much any other well written (see why I hate ep. I, II, & III?) science fiction.. So when I had the procedure to have a port installed in my chest, the first thing I thought was "cool; cyborg!" This actually helped with the kids....
I had the procedure to have a port installed on Monday the 3rd. Pretty simple operation, really. It's a little metal and plastic disc that is just under the skin on the right side of my chest just below the collar bone. They use it to inject me with IV chemotherapy without putting a fresh needle in my elbow every time. The main reason they went this route, is so I can have a 46 hour chemo delivery and still be ambulatory. (This means I can still do stuff!) I'll have a little fanny pack, kinda like an insulin pump that I wear around for a couple of days every other week.
If you know me, you know I like to crack jokes, make odd observations, and just make people laugh as much as possible. According to Angela, I did my job well during the port installation. I really do not remember much from it, other than one time a nurse telling me to wake up because I was slipping a little too deep into sleep. But Angela says she could hear laughing often coming from the room! Mission accomplished!
Of course, when I came out of the meds, I was still a bit loopy. Angela drove home (It was another fine West Michigan winter day) I made her stop at one point so I could get her to take my picture on the snow bank...
The kids were a little freaked out when they saw the bandages. I can't really blame them, it looked pretty bad, there was a lot of bruising around the area, as you might expect... The thing that finally setteled the, down was pointing out that I was more like Darth Vader now. I made them fell the bump, and the little tube that actually is inserted into my jugular. Now it was cool!
I still reach up and touch it all the time. It's so strange to have something like that attached to your body... Resistance is futile.
I had the procedure to have a port installed on Monday the 3rd. Pretty simple operation, really. It's a little metal and plastic disc that is just under the skin on the right side of my chest just below the collar bone. They use it to inject me with IV chemotherapy without putting a fresh needle in my elbow every time. The main reason they went this route, is so I can have a 46 hour chemo delivery and still be ambulatory. (This means I can still do stuff!) I'll have a little fanny pack, kinda like an insulin pump that I wear around for a couple of days every other week.
If you know me, you know I like to crack jokes, make odd observations, and just make people laugh as much as possible. According to Angela, I did my job well during the port installation. I really do not remember much from it, other than one time a nurse telling me to wake up because I was slipping a little too deep into sleep. But Angela says she could hear laughing often coming from the room! Mission accomplished!
Of course, when I came out of the meds, I was still a bit loopy. Angela drove home (It was another fine West Michigan winter day) I made her stop at one point so I could get her to take my picture on the snow bank...
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| Don't ask me, I'm wasted! |
The kids were a little freaked out when they saw the bandages. I can't really blame them, it looked pretty bad, there was a lot of bruising around the area, as you might expect... The thing that finally setteled the, down was pointing out that I was more like Darth Vader now. I made them fell the bump, and the little tube that actually is inserted into my jugular. Now it was cool!
I still reach up and touch it all the time. It's so strange to have something like that attached to your body... Resistance is futile.
OK.... Now what?
You may find this amazing or crazy, but there has only been one night, just one, that I had a hard time sleeping because of all this... Parts of me wonder of that means I'm somehow psychotic... Oh wait, I think its called peace.
I'm almost caught up to the present at this point. pretty soon my updates are going to be new to everybody (including me). Some you you may have already heard all this directly from me... So it won't be long before there's something for everyone, as they say...
This missing piece to the puzzle is the colonoscopy. If you've never had one, count your blessings! It's not a good time. Actually, the colonoscopy itself is a breeze; it's the preparation that stinks! You have to drink a gallon of what is basically antifreeze... 8 ounces at a time every fifteen minuets until it's gone. Oh, and you have to fast for several hours before and, and several hours after. (I've lost over 15 pounds since all this started just from all the starvation diets I've been on!) The "cleansing" is terrible.. Sounds like fun, eh?
That being said, anybody over 50 should get checked out! Any family member of mine on either side should get checked out too. I'm 39, and that's a long way from the normal scheduled check. Research says it normally takes between 10 and 15 years for a polyp to develop into cancer. If that's the case, and this was the delivery method of my cancer, this started before I was 30! My oldest child is 10. (Do the math...)
What if I caught this somehow right at the beginning? If I found out I had cancer at 29, would we have pursued children? Would I have these 3 amazing, wonderful kids? If I had it to do over, I would choose finding out now, and having my kids every time. I pray that I'm not going to leave them early... I have two daughters that need to be walked down the aisle someday, and a son that wants to be a professional hockey player more than almost anything. (Even his "girlfriend" is a hockey player... she's a keeper!) I would very much like things to get back to normal, but I have no idea what normal is right now...
Anyway, I had my procedure, and it was OK. I went to sleep, and woke to a doctor explaining that it went really well. I got the results in less than 24 hours (I didn't think that was possible!), and the results said colon, and NOT pancreatic cancer! Praise God!!!
Next step; the port.
dun dun DUN!
I'm almost caught up to the present at this point. pretty soon my updates are going to be new to everybody (including me). Some you you may have already heard all this directly from me... So it won't be long before there's something for everyone, as they say...
This missing piece to the puzzle is the colonoscopy. If you've never had one, count your blessings! It's not a good time. Actually, the colonoscopy itself is a breeze; it's the preparation that stinks! You have to drink a gallon of what is basically antifreeze... 8 ounces at a time every fifteen minuets until it's gone. Oh, and you have to fast for several hours before and, and several hours after. (I've lost over 15 pounds since all this started just from all the starvation diets I've been on!) The "cleansing" is terrible.. Sounds like fun, eh?
That being said, anybody over 50 should get checked out! Any family member of mine on either side should get checked out too. I'm 39, and that's a long way from the normal scheduled check. Research says it normally takes between 10 and 15 years for a polyp to develop into cancer. If that's the case, and this was the delivery method of my cancer, this started before I was 30! My oldest child is 10. (Do the math...)
What if I caught this somehow right at the beginning? If I found out I had cancer at 29, would we have pursued children? Would I have these 3 amazing, wonderful kids? If I had it to do over, I would choose finding out now, and having my kids every time. I pray that I'm not going to leave them early... I have two daughters that need to be walked down the aisle someday, and a son that wants to be a professional hockey player more than almost anything. (Even his "girlfriend" is a hockey player... she's a keeper!) I would very much like things to get back to normal, but I have no idea what normal is right now...
Anyway, I had my procedure, and it was OK. I went to sleep, and woke to a doctor explaining that it went really well. I got the results in less than 24 hours (I didn't think that was possible!), and the results said colon, and NOT pancreatic cancer! Praise God!!!
Next step; the port.
dun dun DUN!
Biopsy day: good news and bad news...
They let me go home Wednesday afternoon... After being cooped up in the hospital for a few days, I forgot how snow you saps were getting!
I went back to work as soon as I could. My techs at Lakeland knew what was going on, but didn't know I was out. Bill had scheduled the work down there, but I took the call from them, because I thought it would be a cool surprise to just show up!
In typical fashion I was over a half hour late (even after leaving a half hour early because of the weather). Didn't mater, it was cool to lighten someones day just by not being dead. (That's about the easiest way to do it, eh?) It felt great to be useful again too. I know things will probably never be "normal" again, but I just want to pretend...
Friday was biopsy results day, and I was pretty anxious to get there and find out what was happening. At this point they had only performed a liver biopsy, and still had not scheduled a colonoscopy because of the dicey nature of my appendix. So we kinda knew the results wouldn't be complete... At this point I was still holding out some hope that the liver lesions were not cancerous.
Well, that didn't work out. It was conclusive that the spots on my liver were cancerous, and that it originated in my GI tract. There was also some blood test results, and this was where thing got a little scary (as if it wasn't already) I had elevated levels that could have indicated colon OR pancreatic cancer! However, the doctor said that he thought pancreatic was unlikely because the pancreas didn't look bad on the CT, and the colon had a very obvious tumor.
The really good news from this visit was what I was told about my situation regardless of what type of cancer it was. That was the fact that I had no actual symptoms, meaning all organ function was still normal, all my blood enzymes were normal, basically everything was fine with the exception of a big ol' ugly tumor on my colon, and a liver that looks like swiss cheese. The big deal here is that I'M NOT SICK! As the doc said "We do not have to kill a single cancer cell, all we have to do is keep it from spreading and you can live another 30 or 40 years easy!"
I picked up on that one sentence and ran with it. I walked out of there feeling pretty good. Angela walked out of there thinking about pancreatic cancer.
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| LRMC in St Joseph, MI |
I went back to work as soon as I could. My techs at Lakeland knew what was going on, but didn't know I was out. Bill had scheduled the work down there, but I took the call from them, because I thought it would be a cool surprise to just show up!
In typical fashion I was over a half hour late (even after leaving a half hour early because of the weather). Didn't mater, it was cool to lighten someones day just by not being dead. (That's about the easiest way to do it, eh?) It felt great to be useful again too. I know things will probably never be "normal" again, but I just want to pretend...
Friday was biopsy results day, and I was pretty anxious to get there and find out what was happening. At this point they had only performed a liver biopsy, and still had not scheduled a colonoscopy because of the dicey nature of my appendix. So we kinda knew the results wouldn't be complete... At this point I was still holding out some hope that the liver lesions were not cancerous.
Well, that didn't work out. It was conclusive that the spots on my liver were cancerous, and that it originated in my GI tract. There was also some blood test results, and this was where thing got a little scary (as if it wasn't already) I had elevated levels that could have indicated colon OR pancreatic cancer! However, the doctor said that he thought pancreatic was unlikely because the pancreas didn't look bad on the CT, and the colon had a very obvious tumor.
The really good news from this visit was what I was told about my situation regardless of what type of cancer it was. That was the fact that I had no actual symptoms, meaning all organ function was still normal, all my blood enzymes were normal, basically everything was fine with the exception of a big ol' ugly tumor on my colon, and a liver that looks like swiss cheese. The big deal here is that I'M NOT SICK! As the doc said "We do not have to kill a single cancer cell, all we have to do is keep it from spreading and you can live another 30 or 40 years easy!"
I picked up on that one sentence and ran with it. I walked out of there feeling pretty good. Angela walked out of there thinking about pancreatic cancer.
Monday, February 10, 2014
The best part about being in the hospital is going home!
They let me out on Wednesday (1/22). There was no way I would be getting test results back that day, and possibly now for the rest of the week. I made it known that I would very much like to go home. The only thing keeping me there was the IV antibiotics that I was on.One of the resident doctors said she would make it a point to see if I could get out of there. I told her I would add here to the Christmas card list if she could pull it off. SHE DID! She came back a few hours later, and said I could take the last of the antibiotics orally! I hadn't been so happy since this whole ordeal started...
We did send her a card, and she sent one back!
I learned something from this experience... I'm sure most of you know you should never send food back to the cook in a restaurant... Unless you like spit in you food... I think it's a similar mindset in the hospital. Do not complain, or provoke the people responsible for your health/safety. These people are sticking needles in your arms, liver, administering drugs, etc... Do you really want these people mad at you? I in no way mean to imply that they would behave inappropriately, or unprofessionally, but think about it... Happy people work harder than unhappy people...
We did send her a card, and she sent one back!
I learned something from this experience... I'm sure most of you know you should never send food back to the cook in a restaurant... Unless you like spit in you food... I think it's a similar mindset in the hospital. Do not complain, or provoke the people responsible for your health/safety. These people are sticking needles in your arms, liver, administering drugs, etc... Do you really want these people mad at you? I in no way mean to imply that they would behave inappropriately, or unprofessionally, but think about it... Happy people work harder than unhappy people...
At Least It's Not My Suck Thumb!
Abi was a thumb sucker from the womb. We have ultrasound pictures with her sucking her thumb. She is also a hopeless optimist. She can find something positive in almost any situation... When she was around 3 years old, she somehow smashed her thumb while playing outside. She came running to the house holding her bleeding thumb almost in hysterics.. It took a few minuets to calm her down and figure out what happened... Her response? "At least it's not my (sob) suck thumb!"
OK, Monday was terrible. I had a Xanax, and slept like a baby anyway. I was awakened Tuesday morning by someone shaking my leg. I found out that it was the oncologist. He had a MUCH different bedside manner than the surgeon from the day before. He, like every other doctor, wanted to hear my story on how I got there. He listened closely, and only stopped me a couple of times to ask for clarification. When I mentioned having cancer, he interrupted and raised his hand to say " wait a minuet! You don't know if you have cancer. We haven't biopsied anything!" I had a little hope restored... This guy wasn't all pie in the sky, he was careful to point out that my situation was very serious, but he also made sure that I had something to grab on to.
Let me stop now to say that I had something to grab on to the whole time. As a Christian, my hope does not come from man, regardless. Right from the beginning, the thought of dying was not one of my fears. (It still isn't!) Of course, I do not want to die, but I have no fear of what comes next or where I go from here...
The fact is, I was relieved that maybe I would be sticking around for a little while longer! They setup a liver biopsy for later that day. That was the first time I was "put under" since I had my tonsils out when I was four... They also drew a bunch of blood for more tests, and I went back to the waiting/holding pattern...
OK, Monday was terrible. I had a Xanax, and slept like a baby anyway. I was awakened Tuesday morning by someone shaking my leg. I found out that it was the oncologist. He had a MUCH different bedside manner than the surgeon from the day before. He, like every other doctor, wanted to hear my story on how I got there. He listened closely, and only stopped me a couple of times to ask for clarification. When I mentioned having cancer, he interrupted and raised his hand to say " wait a minuet! You don't know if you have cancer. We haven't biopsied anything!" I had a little hope restored... This guy wasn't all pie in the sky, he was careful to point out that my situation was very serious, but he also made sure that I had something to grab on to.
Let me stop now to say that I had something to grab on to the whole time. As a Christian, my hope does not come from man, regardless. Right from the beginning, the thought of dying was not one of my fears. (It still isn't!) Of course, I do not want to die, but I have no fear of what comes next or where I go from here...
The fact is, I was relieved that maybe I would be sticking around for a little while longer! They setup a liver biopsy for later that day. That was the first time I was "put under" since I had my tonsils out when I was four... They also drew a bunch of blood for more tests, and I went back to the waiting/holding pattern...
Monday's stink...
Everybody jokes about how bad Mondays are.... This Monday takes the cake.
OK, just to recap, I still didn't officially know what was going on. The "c" word had been said, but no further tests had been run other than that pre-op CT. All I have been doing is sitting around and waiting so far. All the doctors and nurses up to this point had been saying there would be no decision until Monday. They were waiting for the surgeon to come in Monday morning.
While I waited, someone thought it would be a good idea to get a CT on the rest of my torso (can't argue with that!) to make sure there wouldn't be anymore surprises. That came back clean, so no lung cancer...
I was warned by pretty much every nurse that day to be careful about the surgeon. I was told that I should be careful about asking him questions, because I may not like the answers I received... I should have heeded their advice. Dr Death came in a little after noon. (I still have not eaten since breakfast on Saturday...) He walked into the room introducing himself, and basically just stood there staring at me... I made the mistake of asking him "Well, what do ya think?" He said very flatly. "I think you have stage four colon cancer that had metastasized to your liver, and you probably have two to three years." He never looked away; never changed the expression on his face. Then he very flatly added "Sorry."
I said that I appreciated that he was honest in his opinion (I lied, I didn't appreciate this at all!) Dr Death threw me a life line at this point! He said "Of course, we haven't even got a biopsy yet, so there's no way to be sure." Oh good, maybe it's not so bad! "But I can count the number of times I've been wrong on one hand." YOU JERK! why do throw a life line out just to yank it back??!?
Monday was a very bad day. After the doctor left was the first time I shed a tear. All I could think about was what would happen to the kids and Angela. How could I leave behind three young, YOUNG children? They didn't deserve to lose their dad like this... I came close to losing it... I had been texting with an old friend that happens to be a nurse, and I sent him a message shortly after Dr D left. He gave me some very sound advice that I should ask for something to calm me down. I didn't even know how to ask, but I fumbled though it, and a doctor prescribed a Xanax. That was around 2PM...
Needless to say, I responded well to it! I slept so hard that night, that I had to be shook awake the next morning.
OK, just to recap, I still didn't officially know what was going on. The "c" word had been said, but no further tests had been run other than that pre-op CT. All I have been doing is sitting around and waiting so far. All the doctors and nurses up to this point had been saying there would be no decision until Monday. They were waiting for the surgeon to come in Monday morning.
While I waited, someone thought it would be a good idea to get a CT on the rest of my torso (can't argue with that!) to make sure there wouldn't be anymore surprises. That came back clean, so no lung cancer...
I was warned by pretty much every nurse that day to be careful about the surgeon. I was told that I should be careful about asking him questions, because I may not like the answers I received... I should have heeded their advice. Dr Death came in a little after noon. (I still have not eaten since breakfast on Saturday...) He walked into the room introducing himself, and basically just stood there staring at me... I made the mistake of asking him "Well, what do ya think?" He said very flatly. "I think you have stage four colon cancer that had metastasized to your liver, and you probably have two to three years." He never looked away; never changed the expression on his face. Then he very flatly added "Sorry."
I said that I appreciated that he was honest in his opinion (I lied, I didn't appreciate this at all!) Dr Death threw me a life line at this point! He said "Of course, we haven't even got a biopsy yet, so there's no way to be sure." Oh good, maybe it's not so bad! "But I can count the number of times I've been wrong on one hand." YOU JERK! why do throw a life line out just to yank it back??!?
Monday was a very bad day. After the doctor left was the first time I shed a tear. All I could think about was what would happen to the kids and Angela. How could I leave behind three young, YOUNG children? They didn't deserve to lose their dad like this... I came close to losing it... I had been texting with an old friend that happens to be a nurse, and I sent him a message shortly after Dr D left. He gave me some very sound advice that I should ask for something to calm me down. I didn't even know how to ask, but I fumbled though it, and a doctor prescribed a Xanax. That was around 2PM...
Needless to say, I responded well to it! I slept so hard that night, that I had to be shook awake the next morning.
Friday, February 7, 2014
I Think I'll Go Far a Walk!
You're not fooling anybody, you'll be stone dead in a moment!
Saturday passed without much more excitement. Several nurses came through, a couple of doctors, but there wasn't much to say. It was the weekend afterall, and that meant nobody wanted to make a hard desision. They put me on some heavy IV antibiotics to try to get my appendix to chill out. They did not want to remove it because that would mean I couldn't get chemotherepy for 8 week, and it was pretty much assumed i would going to need it at that time.
I noticed a lot of puppy dog eyes from the nurses at that time. I didn't like that, I didn't feel like I was that sick, I mean, I know what the scan showed, but other than an appendix flair up, I was fine... This was NOT denial! I fully understood what was happening, but it just seemed crazy, and everyone agreed. Every doctor and nurse that came in couldn't believe that I could be so sick, and have gone that far though this ordeal with no tangible symptoms! All my vitals were good, except my BP which would fluctuate from 119/70 to 150/99 depending on what news I had just received. At this point I hadn't been given so much as a Tylenol... I didn't need it. I had some pain, but not "admit me to the hospital, I'm dying" pain...
That was Saturday...
Sunday:
A whole bunch of waiting. I still hadn't posted anything on social media, I hadn't made too many calls, because there wasn't much definitive to say... I still didn't know if I was having surgery or what... I had a few visitors... Overall it was a long boring day. They allowed me to get up and walk around with my IV pole in tow. I took advantage of that! I was bored just sitting there... I did get to watch both the NFC and AFC championship games though, so that was nice. I scared a nurse half to death when she was telling me something unnecessary, just then, an interception was thrown in one of the football games, and I shouted "Oh no!" She stopped dead in the middle of her speech,and wanted to know what I objected to, I just pointed over her shoulder, at the TV on the wall....
Saturday passed without much more excitement. Several nurses came through, a couple of doctors, but there wasn't much to say. It was the weekend afterall, and that meant nobody wanted to make a hard desision. They put me on some heavy IV antibiotics to try to get my appendix to chill out. They did not want to remove it because that would mean I couldn't get chemotherepy for 8 week, and it was pretty much assumed i would going to need it at that time.
I noticed a lot of puppy dog eyes from the nurses at that time. I didn't like that, I didn't feel like I was that sick, I mean, I know what the scan showed, but other than an appendix flair up, I was fine... This was NOT denial! I fully understood what was happening, but it just seemed crazy, and everyone agreed. Every doctor and nurse that came in couldn't believe that I could be so sick, and have gone that far though this ordeal with no tangible symptoms! All my vitals were good, except my BP which would fluctuate from 119/70 to 150/99 depending on what news I had just received. At this point I hadn't been given so much as a Tylenol... I didn't need it. I had some pain, but not "admit me to the hospital, I'm dying" pain...
That was Saturday...
Sunday:
A whole bunch of waiting. I still hadn't posted anything on social media, I hadn't made too many calls, because there wasn't much definitive to say... I still didn't know if I was having surgery or what... I had a few visitors... Overall it was a long boring day. They allowed me to get up and walk around with my IV pole in tow. I took advantage of that! I was bored just sitting there... I did get to watch both the NFC and AFC championship games though, so that was nice. I scared a nurse half to death when she was telling me something unnecessary, just then, an interception was thrown in one of the football games, and I shouted "Oh no!" She stopped dead in the middle of her speech,and wanted to know what I objected to, I just pointed over her shoulder, at the TV on the wall....
A Change of Venue
In our previous episode, our hero just found out he may have colon cancer and that it appears to have spread to it liver... Let's see how he reacts! (we also replaced his regular coffee with Floger's Crystals)
I called Angela as soon as I found out. She was almost there, but I dropped my little bomb shell on her right then. That must have been pretty horrible to take it in like that while driving, but I couldn't hide the fact that something went very wrong from our previous conversations. They wanted to take me by ambulance to Spectrum in Grand Rapids! I reminded them that I drove myself there, and that I could drive to Grand Rapids too...
It's strange the things that enter your mind at a time like that. My first thought was that I needed to let Bill Fey know that I wouldn't be at work on Monday, and he would have to go to Traverse City for me. I also let my pastor know at about the same time. I was absolutely amazed when he showed up in what seemed like mere minuets! Not only that, but he had one of our deacons with him. Angela, and I got a look at the CT scan at this point. It looked pretty bad even to the untrained eye. I mean, a liver isn't supposed to look like a piece of swiss cheese, right? I called my parents at this point... That was less than fun. They didn't even know about the appendix issue, so it was all new for them!
Krystal came and picked up the kids, Cassie and Luke took care of my truck, and Angela and I drove up to Grand Rapids together. It was pretty surreal to just waltz into a hospital with a handful of papers, and have them put you in a bed and hook you up to an IV in just a few minuets! This is all on Saturday night... We didn't know what was going to happen; we didn't know for certain what kind of cancer (or if it even was cancer). We didn't know how long we would be there; we didn't know anything!
I called Angela as soon as I found out. She was almost there, but I dropped my little bomb shell on her right then. That must have been pretty horrible to take it in like that while driving, but I couldn't hide the fact that something went very wrong from our previous conversations. They wanted to take me by ambulance to Spectrum in Grand Rapids! I reminded them that I drove myself there, and that I could drive to Grand Rapids too...
It's strange the things that enter your mind at a time like that. My first thought was that I needed to let Bill Fey know that I wouldn't be at work on Monday, and he would have to go to Traverse City for me. I also let my pastor know at about the same time. I was absolutely amazed when he showed up in what seemed like mere minuets! Not only that, but he had one of our deacons with him. Angela, and I got a look at the CT scan at this point. It looked pretty bad even to the untrained eye. I mean, a liver isn't supposed to look like a piece of swiss cheese, right? I called my parents at this point... That was less than fun. They didn't even know about the appendix issue, so it was all new for them!
Krystal came and picked up the kids, Cassie and Luke took care of my truck, and Angela and I drove up to Grand Rapids together. It was pretty surreal to just waltz into a hospital with a handful of papers, and have them put you in a bed and hook you up to an IV in just a few minuets! This is all on Saturday night... We didn't know what was going to happen; we didn't know for certain what kind of cancer (or if it even was cancer). We didn't know how long we would be there; we didn't know anything!
It's not appendicitis, or a hernia
Mistake #1
I started to have some stomach pains a few years ago. Unlike most men, and my normal behavior, I did go to the doctor to get it checked out. I was told that I had some minor abdominal tears (hernia) and that I didn't really need to do anything about it if I could handle the discomfort. I didn't think it was too bad, so I decided to live with it..
Fast forward to last month: (1/18/14 to be exact)
As you know, we've had a little bit of snow this winter... I have been shoveling tons of snow out of my driveway. It seems like the snow will never end BUT, it may have saved my life! All that shoveling caused me to strain my stomach (so I though, anyway). I put up with it for about a week, before it changed. I woke up at about 4 am with a very localized pain half way between my navel and right hip. I was able to get back to sleep, but thought I may be headed to the hospital later that day. I had breakfast as normal, but skipped lunch. Angela and the kids had a birthday party to go to, so I figured I could drive myself to the hospital.
I went to Zeeland's emergency room, and they made a quick diagnosis of appendicitis. I was slapped on a table and hooked up to an IV. You have to be well hydrated to get a CT scan, and they do not operate on anybody with out a pre-op scan. I went in for my first ever CT (the first of many, I'm sure), and was wheeled back to my ER room to wait for the results. The ER doc came in and said he saw the CT frame with the appendix on it, and certainly irritated. At that point the anesthetist came in and started asking all the questions they ask before an operation.
I called Angela and let her know that I was going under the knife. At this point it was all fun and games at that point. We had talked earlier in the month about losing weight and had set numbers we would like to hit. I was joking about how much an appendix weighs, and how I was going to win our little contest. She was on her way so she could be there when I woke up. It was then that the doc came back, and had a totally different expression on his face. He said the Radiologist had looked over the scan, and there was much more going on. He showed me the full CT, it showed a large mass on my colon near my appendix (it was inflamed), and several spots on my liver.
It seemed like I could feel the tumor the second he said it.
I started to have some stomach pains a few years ago. Unlike most men, and my normal behavior, I did go to the doctor to get it checked out. I was told that I had some minor abdominal tears (hernia) and that I didn't really need to do anything about it if I could handle the discomfort. I didn't think it was too bad, so I decided to live with it..
Fast forward to last month: (1/18/14 to be exact)
As you know, we've had a little bit of snow this winter... I have been shoveling tons of snow out of my driveway. It seems like the snow will never end BUT, it may have saved my life! All that shoveling caused me to strain my stomach (so I though, anyway). I put up with it for about a week, before it changed. I woke up at about 4 am with a very localized pain half way between my navel and right hip. I was able to get back to sleep, but thought I may be headed to the hospital later that day. I had breakfast as normal, but skipped lunch. Angela and the kids had a birthday party to go to, so I figured I could drive myself to the hospital.
I went to Zeeland's emergency room, and they made a quick diagnosis of appendicitis. I was slapped on a table and hooked up to an IV. You have to be well hydrated to get a CT scan, and they do not operate on anybody with out a pre-op scan. I went in for my first ever CT (the first of many, I'm sure), and was wheeled back to my ER room to wait for the results. The ER doc came in and said he saw the CT frame with the appendix on it, and certainly irritated. At that point the anesthetist came in and started asking all the questions they ask before an operation.
I called Angela and let her know that I was going under the knife. At this point it was all fun and games at that point. We had talked earlier in the month about losing weight and had set numbers we would like to hit. I was joking about how much an appendix weighs, and how I was going to win our little contest. She was on her way so she could be there when I woke up. It was then that the doc came back, and had a totally different expression on his face. He said the Radiologist had looked over the scan, and there was much more going on. He showed me the full CT, it showed a large mass on my colon near my appendix (it was inflamed), and several spots on my liver.
It seemed like I could feel the tumor the second he said it.
OK where did we really begin?
If you're offended by my flippant attitude about having cancer, you may not like this blog. I have have had several people tell me I should open a "care page". I thought about it for a while, but those are a little too shall we say feminine for me... So I figured blogspot was the way to go!
I'll do think it's important to chronicle my experience, and already wish i would have started sooner, as some of the original details are starting to fade. I'm going to try to rewind the clock to the beginning, and bring it up to the present, and then give details, and insights as we move forward.
OK, the picture in the previous post is old, and I didn't make it up, but I've seen it floating around the internet... Anyway it was the first thing that popped into my head when I found out what was happening. I told it to Angela, and for some reason she didn't find it funny... Some people have a lousy sense of humor...
I'll do think it's important to chronicle my experience, and already wish i would have started sooner, as some of the original details are starting to fade. I'm going to try to rewind the clock to the beginning, and bring it up to the present, and then give details, and insights as we move forward.
OK, the picture in the previous post is old, and I didn't make it up, but I've seen it floating around the internet... Anyway it was the first thing that popped into my head when I found out what was happening. I told it to Angela, and for some reason she didn't find it funny... Some people have a lousy sense of humor...
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